Thursday, June 17, 2010

The Friends

I have been thinking about "friendship" for the past two months. Throughout my life I have made friends with many people. When I was at the kindergarten, I have a best friend. She lived two doors away from my house. She was a very pretty girl and always wore beautiful dress. Later, we went to the same primary school but we were in different class. So, we only met each other during recess. Then she moved to another school far away. I have not seen her nor heard from her until now.

When she left, during recess, I hang out with the girl sitting next to me in class. She became my dear friend. I had other friends too. I was good at drawing. I used to draw pictures for my friends. I copied pictures of cartoon caricatures on pencil box for them.

When I was in Year 2, I took part in 100 metre race and won. Some friends were not happy that I won. I realised then they were not really my friends.
As my school was about 8 miles away from my house, my parents transferred me to a new school. I made new friends. I spent a lot of time with them. Even during recess, we shared our food and drink. We also played and did school activities together. In short, we did a lot of things together including visiting each other on Hari Raya. I loved my friends in my new school. Four years passed quickly and we had to go on our separate ways.

After primary school, I went to a fully residential girls’ school. Practically, I grew up there. I learned a lot about friendship. I picked a few dos and don’ts in friendship. There were friends whom I could share my thoughts and feelings. There were some who like to share the good parts of my life only. After our final exam, a friend confessed before we parted that I was a loyal friend.

At university, I made more friends. As I was studying in UK, my friends came from all over the world. I had friends from Japan, Turkey, Mauritius, Middle East, Iran, China, USA and UK. We learned about each other’s culture and food. I did not have problem with them because we respected each other’s belief and opinion.

I had of course some close friends from my own country. We shared ups and downs in our lives. We helped each other to go through difficult life in a foreign country. I remember the meals that we cooked and ate together, the trips to Paris and the laugh we had as we slide down the hill around the compound of the university when it was snowing. University life had given me the opportunity to make friends with male and female. It had definitely made me a wise, calm and sensible being.

Facebook then came to knock on my door in 2008 but I did not pay much attention on it until the first quarter of year 2009. An old friend tracked me down and we got connected. It was exciting as I traced more friends through her. Thanked to her! However I decided to end connecting through facebook as it takes so much of my time. I love all my friends. We had grown up together in the hostel and I find we have a lot in common even after leaving school for 25 years. I make an effort to get connected with them via e-mail once a week. I am keeping their phone numbers too and hope they will be a reunion soon so that we can do some catching up.

I had the most painful experience with a friend recently. I lost contact with her about two years ago. I was very much preoccupied with my father who was ill. I had looked after him in the hospital day and night for almost ten days. When I returned home, I managed to check my e-mail. There were a few e-mails from her. I replied to her e-mail immediately but I received failure notice. I called her mobile but it had been terminated. Somehow Allah wanted to show me what sort of friend she was. After two years, a friend gave me her number. I was so thrilled! Excitedly I dialled her number. She answered but the moment she heard my voice, she cut me off. I called her countless times and sent text messages. Silence. No answer. I got her "message" after I shed a lot of tears.I pray to Allah I would not meet a friend like her again.I hope we would not come across each other in the future because she had broken my heart into pieces.It would be awkward to meet her.But I forgive her!I do not want her to run after me when I am crossing the bridge to heaven.

Well, this experience teaches me not everyone can be a good friend.She can cut me off from her life but I have many friends whom I care about and they, in return care about me.

I have another good friend who has been quiet for almost a year. Usually she would send me wishes on Teachers’ day or Hari Raya. Sometimes she would just call me and asked about my well-being. I decided to call her. It seemed that her father had suffered from stroke and she was looking after him. Even as I am writing, she is still looking after him at home. I understand her situation and never even once has ill-thought about her.

At work I have friends who make my work easier, whom I see even after work and who brings souvenirs for me from their trips overseas.

What does friend mean then?
One anonymous writer had put it beautifully
“To me, friends touch your heart, challenge your mind, inspire you to pursue your passions, double the good times, halve the bad times and make your life a happier and more fulfilling place to be.”

As a Muslim, I believe that if you have many good friends, you will then have many friends in heaven. Your friends who help you in the world will help you again in the hereafter.That's why Muslims are encouraged to visit their dead parents' friends.

Is it safe to texting and driving?

Wake up call to all drivers!
Please stop texting and driving.
Studies have shown that drivers who are texting and driving,are distracted on the road and cause accidents.


Monday, June 14, 2010

What does friendship mean?

"A friend who shares the same believe is like the sun that shines
While a loyal friend is like perfume which leaves the sweet fragrant behind
A true friend is the one who motivates us to realise our dream
and a friend with noble heart takes us to the right path"